..."fine" I say with tear filled eyes. But I am not "fine" and this is not "fine". The nurses (sisters) are very kind in their inquires after Seth's well-being. He is a favorite at the hospital is seems but when they ask me how I am I just want to scream. Yes, the pendulum of emotions has swung again. I go from numb, to grateful, to hopeful, to distraught, to sad, to punch-face angry!
I look at my beautiful little boy with huge scars on his perfect head and my little girl with large welts. Then I watch my husband walk his fingers across his chest like he is playing itsy-bitsy spider to pick up his spaghetti spoon so he can scratch his ear. I am grateful that things are as good as they are, that we are alive, that we will recover but we will never be the same and my heart aches and painful, angry tears burn my eyes.